11:00

OK THIS WAS MY SENIOR YEAR IN HIGH SCHOOL, I WAS 17 YEARS OLD. I WAS OUT WITH MY FRIENDS BOBBY, ROD, MIKE, JEFF & JOYCE. IT WAS A FRIDAY NIGHT AND WE WERE GOING TO DRINK, JOYCE & I WERE DRINKING VODKA, AS USUAL, AND AS ALWAYS WE LET BOBBY MIX OUR DRINKS. HE ALWAYS HAD WHAT WE WANTED BEFORE HE PICKED US UP. WE STOP THE CAR AT THE LOCAL 7-11 AND SOME ONE RAN IN PROBALLY TO GET 'BUTTS AND THE BIG CUPS. YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND MOST OF THIS NIGHT IS FOGGY TO ME. SO AS BOBBY MIXED OUR DRINKS, I DO KNOW THAT ABOUT 3/4 OF THE 5TH OF VODKA WERE IN MY CUP (I DIDN'T LEARN THIS TILL THE NEXT DAY WHEN I SAW WHAT WAS LEFT IN THE BOTTLE) A COUPLE OF CUBES OF ICE AND A HINT OF OJ FOR COLOR. WELL OFF WE ALL WENT IN THE CAR TO OUR LOCAL HANGOUT A FEW CITY'S OVER. I DO KNOW THE RIDE THERE WAS ONLY 7 MINUTES, WE TIME IT ALL THE TIME SO WE WEREN'T LATE FOR CURFEW. WELL BY THE TIME WE ARRIVE AT OUR DESTINATION, 7 MINUTES LATER.......MY CUP WAS EMPTY. I DO REMEMBER AT SOME POINT CHATTING WITH ROD THIS WAS ONLY THE SECOND TIME I HAD MET HIM. I AT SOME POINT THAT EVENING INVITED MYSELF TO HIS PROM.
WELL I DO HAVE TO SAY THANKS TO BOBBY & ROD BECAUSE MY FAVORITE THING TO DO WAS TO LAY ON THE ROOF OF CARS BACK THEN (NOT WHILE THEY WERE DRIVING) BUT THEY DECIDED THAT IT WOULD BE FUN TO SEE IF I COULD WALK. THEY PROCEEDED TO DRAG ME UP AND DOWN THE STREET, I KNOW I WASN'T WALKING. BUT I'M SURE THAT IF THEY HADN'T DONE THIS I PROBALLY WOULD HAVE DIED RIGHT THERE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. WELL ANYWAY, SO WHEN IT WAS TIME TO GO HOME, I MANAGED TO SIT IN THE BACK SEAT WITH ROD AND PASS OUT FACE DOWN IN HIS LAP. YES MY FACE WAS RIGHT THERE. NO I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING AT ALL, I WAS STILL A GOOD GIRL THEN, I HAD BARELY EVEN KISSED A BOY AT THIS POINT. I BARELY REMEMBER THE RIDE HOME, I HAVE FLASHES OF WHAT HAPPENED. I DO REMEMBER WHEN I GOT DROPPED OFF ONLY BOBBY & MIKE WERE IN THE CAR.

NOW JUST TO GIVE YOU INFO BEFORE I TELL THIS THE REST OF THIS STORY. WE LIVE ON THE SECOND FLOOR OF A HOUSE AND THERE WAS AN ENTIRE FLIGHT OF STAIRS BEFORE YOU GOT TO OUR FRONT DOOR. ALSO MY PARENTS USED TO WORK NIGHTS, SO THE WERE NEVER HOME WHEN I GOT THERE, I JUST HAD TO CALL HER (THIS WAS BEFORE CELL PHONES) AND TELL HER I WAS HOME SAFELY.

OK SO NOW I GET OUT OF THE CAR AND ATTEMPT TO WALK UP THE FRONT STAIRS. I DIDN'T REMEMBER THAT THEY TURNED SO I WALKED DIRECTLY INTO THE HOUSE. I SOME HOW MADE IT UP TO THE DOOR, GOT IT OPENED GOT IN THE HOUSE AND REALIZED THEY WERE HOME. I GOT UP TO OUR APARTMENT, STEPPED IN TO OUR DINING ROOM (WHICH I NEVER WENT IN TO) LOOKED AT THEM AND TOLD THEM I HAD TO GO TO BED I HAD TO BE IN WORK IN 12 HOURS. ITS WAS 11:00PM. THE ONLY TIME I'VE EVER BEEN IN BED BY 11 IS IF I HAVE BEEN UP ALL NIGHT THE NIGHT BEFORE.

WELL AT THIS POINT THEY FIGURED OUT SOMETHING WAS WRONG, BUT LET ME BE. I WENT TO BED. NO ONE EVER TOLD ME YOUR NOT SUPPOSE TO LAY DOWN!!! NOW I'M DIZZY AND THIRSTY. I SOME HOW MADE IT TO THE KITCHEN TO GET WATER, AND ON THE WAY BACK I HAD TO PEE. I SPENT THE NEXT 4 HOURS WITH MY ASS ON THE TOILET AND MY HEAD IN THE SINK. MY MOTHER DID MAKE SURE I DIDN'T DIE & SHE DECIDED THAT HANGOVER I WAS GOING TO HAVE WAS PUNISHMENT ENOUGH.

I WAS HUNG OVER FOR 4 DAYS!!!!!!
DID I MENTION I WORKED MC DONALDS DRIVE THROUGH AND OUR MANAGER WAS VERY STRICK ABOUT HAVING PEOPLE AT THE WINDOW ONLY 30SECONDS??? JOYCE AND I WERE THE FASTEST TEAM THERE SO WEEKENDS DRIVE THROUGH WAS OURS. MY MOTHER WAS THE ONE IF I COULD STILL GET AIR IN TO MY LUNGS I WAS GOING TO SCHOOL NEVER MIND WORK. SO OFF TO WORK I WENT.

THAT WAS IN THE BEGINNING OF 1988. TO THIS DAY, I HAVE NEVER TOUCHED VODKA AGAIN. AND I HAVE NEVER CALLED IN SICK FOR WORK. I GUESS THERE WAS A LESSON LEARNED THERE. SOMEWHERE.

WHAT ARE FRIENDS FOR

OK YEARS AGO WHEN I MOVED OUT OF THE HOUSE FOR THE FIRST TIME I MOVED IN WITH MY FRIENDS AT THE TIME MARY JIMMY, AND THERE TWO CHILDREN. IT WAS A TWO BEDROOM BASEMENT APARTMENT BUT I WAS YOUNG AND IT WAS FUN.

WELL ANYWAY JIMMY HAD THIS REALLY HOT COUSIN GEORGE. WELL GEORGE AND I MADE PLANS TO GO OUT ONE DAY SO HE WAS GOING TO MEET ME AT THE HOUSE, ITS NOT LIKE HE DIDN'T KNOW EVEYONE SO IT WAS NO BIG DEAL THAT HE WAS EARLY OR I WAS LATE. THAT PART I REALLY DON'T REMEMBER. BUT I CAME HOME TO FIND MARY & GEORGE MAKING OUT. HMMM LAST TIME I CHECK MARY & JIMMY WERE BOYFRIEND AND GIRLFRIEND, BUT WHO WAS I TO KNOW BETTER. ANYWAY NEEDLESS TO SAY, GEORGE & I NEVER WENT OUT.

I LIKE YOU

SO ITS FRESHMAN YEAR IN HIGH SCHOOL AND LIKE EVER OTHER GIRL I HAD A CRUSH ON A SENIOR. SEAN WAS IN MY GYM CLASS AND WHEN WE HAD TO SQUARE DANCE (STOP LAUGHING) HE WOULD ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS PICK ME. I CAN'T REMEMBER IF WE HAD ANY STUDY HALLS TOGHETER BUT WE HAD THE SAME GYM CLASS. WELL SEAN WORK AT THE LOCAL DEPARTMENT STORE, SO LIKE EVERY TEENAGE GIRL DOES MY FRIENDS AND I WOULD FREQUENT THE STORE JUST SO THAT I COULD SEE HIM. YOU KNOW WE WOULD WALK BY GIGGLE ETC. SO ONE DAY HE STOPS, POINTS AT ME AND SAY "YOU I LIKE YOU, I REALLY LIKE YOU!!!" SO ME BEING SO MATURE I TOOK OFF IN THE OTHER DIRECTION. HE NEVER EVER SPOKE TO ME AGAIN AFTER THAT DAY, NOT EVEN IN GYM CLASS. THIS WAS THE BEGINING OF MY BROKEN HEART

A PIECE OF TRASH

SO ONE NIGHT A BUNCH OF FRIENDS AND I ARE OUT AT THE LOCAL CLUB. OK I'M WEARING THOSE SAME BLACK BOOTS AND THAT SAME SKIRT FROM NEW YEARS EVE, BUT THIS TIME I'M WEARING A BLACK V-NECK TEE SHIRT AND A BLACK HOODED ZIP-UP SWEATSHIRT. SO I'M IN THE BATHROOM, WHICH IS OF COURSE, OVER CROWDED AND SOME CHICK STARTS TALKING TO ME.....I REALLY THINK SHE WAS HITTING ON ME BUT, SORRY I NEED MALE PARTS FOR MY RELATIONSHIPS. WELL ANY WAY, SHE IS TRYING TO GET ME TO TAKE OF THE SWEATSHIRT BECAUSE "THE OUTFIT YOUR WEARING IS SO CUTE, YOU SHOULD SHOW IT OFF."

OK UNTIL I'M DRUNK, I'M NOT REALLY GOOD AT BEING IN SHORT SLEEVES I'M ALWAY COLD. SO I TOLD HER THANK BUT RIGHT NOW I'M COLD, SO THINK I'M GOING TO LEAVE MY SWEATSHIRT ON. I LEAVE THE BATHROOM AND THINK NOTHING ABOUT THIS. A LITTLE BIT LATER MY FRIEND DONNA AND I START TO HEAD TO THE DANCE FLOOR AND THE SAME CHICK GRABS ME AND PROCEDES TO SAY "YOU LOOK LIKE A PIECE OF TRASH!!"

MY INTELEGENT ANSWER "HUH?"

SO THEN SHE SAY "DON'T YOU GET IT, YOU REALLY LOOK LIKE A PIECE OF TRASH"

I LOOKED AT HER "THAT WAS THE WHOLE IDEA" AND I WALKED OFF. SHE NEVER SAID ANOTHER WORD THE REST OF THE NIGHT, BUT THERE WE PLENTY OF PEOPLE DRESS A HELL OF A LOT TRASHIER THEN I WAS. AS YOU KNOW, I CAN DRESS TRASHY TOO AND THIS JUST WASN'T ONE OF THOSE NIGHTS.
SOMETIMES I REALLY DON'T GET IT???

NOT THE BRIGHTEST BULB

OK SO BACK IN THE 90'S HERE I AM OFF TO A CLUB......OK I WAS POOR I HAD NO CAR SO I TOOK THE BUS. HEY I DIDN'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT DRIVING DRUNK. SO HERE I AM LEAVING MY HOUSE AND POLICE CAR PULLS DOWN THE STREET. HE STOPS AND ASKS ME IF I'M A WORKING GIRL. I TELL HIM YES I DO HAVE A JOB, AND AGAIN HE REPEATS "ARE YOU A WORKING GIRL". OK AFTER THE 4TH TIME OF HIM ASKING ME I THINK HE FIGURED OUT I REALLY HAD NO CLUE WHAT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT. HE WISHED ME A GOOD NIGHT AND THEN DROVE OFF. JUST AS HE PULLED AWAY IT DAWNED ON ME THAT HE WAS ASKING ME IF I WAS A HOOKER. DUH!!!! DON'T KNOW WHAT WOULD HAVE MADE HIM THINK THAT..........KNEE HIGH BLACK BOOTS, MINI SKIRT, LACE TOP (OK IT WAS THE BEGINING OF THE '90).

SO 10+ YEARS LATER, HERE I AM OUT FOR NEW YEARS.....I OVER HEAR A CONVERSATION BETWEEN 3 GUYS TRYING TO DECIDE IF I'M A STRIPPPER. OK AGAIN KNEE HIGH BLACK BOOTS, MINI SKIRT, KIND OF SHEER SWEATER. I REALLY NEED TO START LOOKING AT WHAT I'M WEARING JUST A LITTLE BETTER.